jzul:

oHmyGodGODgdoDDd my brother just sat my mother down in the living room and started hsyterically crying and my mom was so worried until he finally whispered in serious tone “im pregnant”…. my mom started crying and screaming at him until my brother liTELRally POPPED OUT A BABY in my living room and it crawled over and smacked my moM int eh face and said “STOP MAKING THESE SHITTY TEXT POST STORIES FOR NOTES NOBODY BELIEVES THEM”

(Source: ferretdog, via youheldthedoor)

tip: your thighs wouldn’t touch with my face between them

(Source: bestpal, via beyoncyell)

•  temperature gets lower than 60 degrees
• me: JUST HEAR THOSE SLEIGH BELLS JINGLING RING TING TINGLING TOO

(via preciouspayne)

(via faggotstyles)

yiffmyass:

nyeeeeaaaah:

A list of things that do not offend people

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why are all the dots black you fucking racist

(via youheldthedoor)

(via gordonlevitty)

(Source: soulnado, via bornback-wards)

(Source: i-levitty, via deschanelgordon-levitt)

(via kadamsmythe)

Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Joe - Looper (2012)

(via gordonlevitty)

It’s perfect.

(Source: thewalkingdead-latinoamerica, via bitchiethoughts)

#the photo that ended mitt romney’s presidential campaign

(Source: fyeahpolitics, via takecaredrizzy)

(via thwomps)